http://www.raisingkids.co.uk/4_9/PRI_HR01.ASP
Liar, Liar... Encouraging Kids To Be Honest
Children lie for the same reasons that adults lie, to escape punishment, to avoid disapproval or just to make things easier for themselves.
Young children are very transparent and it's obvious when they lie. As they get older they become more adept at deceit and unfortunately become better liars. The best tactic is to make sure openness is recognised and rewarded in the earlier years when it's easier to spot lies.
I never!
Lies like 'I didn't do it' or 'someone else did it' come from fear of punishment or disapproval. Separate the misdemeanor from the lie. Mistakes happen and your child should understand that you don't expect her to be perfect. You do, however, expect her to be honest.
Caught red-handed
If you're sure she's guilty, make it easy for her to own up. Instead of asking 'Did you break your sister's toy?' say 'I notice her toy is broken. Do you have a plan to make it up to her?' This shows you're calm about the misdemeanor and are concentrating on finding a solution to the problem.
Don't play policeman
Avoid trick questions to catch her out. This tells your daughter that you expect her to lie and are trying to trap her. Try to convey the message that you expect her to tell the truth.
If she lies, don't force a confession. State simply that what she says doesn't sound like the truth to you. Tell her that you know she may feel scared of telling the truth. Suggest that she take half an hour or so to think and you can talk together about it later. Be calm and avoid an accusing tone.
Fibbing not Lying
No child is a liar by nature. Don't look at lying as a sign that she will be a bad person. Most adults understand that the lies children tell are usually very trivial - that's why we call them 'fibs' which is much more appropriate for what children do. Lying happens because it is preferable to telling the truth and perhaps your child is afraid to tell the truth. Once she has told the lie is she afraid to own up, because then she will be in big trouble for lying. Remember her age: in some cases will have difficulty in distinguishing truth from fantasy.
Truth and consequences
Don't say she won't be punished if she tells the truth. Letting her off the hook like this doesn't solve any problems. But make it clear that she will be in worse trouble for lying. Point out the consequences of lies - someone else will be blamed, people won't trust you in future.
Once she owns up, don't lecture or get angry because she lied to you before. Don't label her a liar. Once it's over, forget about it. Show appreciation for owning up and telling the truth.
Make it easy for her to own up
Take a softly softly approach. If you know she is lying, don't get upset. Say very gently ' Is that really true? I don't think so, do you?' . Say it with a smile. Make it easy for her to own up to a lie.
And then...
Acknowledge her honesty and praise her for telling the truth. Say something like, 'I'm glad you didn't tell me a fib. I like it much better when you tell me the truth.' If she gets positive response to telling the truth or admitting to telling a lie, then she is more likely to stick to the truth.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
BLOW PENS
My sister gave this set of blowpens to the boys a few days ago. I could not find any of the bond papers we have around here (because everything's not in their proper place due to the ongoing renovations) so I gave them 2 folders to use for their creations. Ethan was very excited. Nikki had some difficulty blowing but at least he kept on trying. Because they enjoyed the activity a lot, they used up all the pens! But no worries because I bought them another set and it only cost P30! Another great thing? It's washable. =D
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Saturday, June 16, 2007
PARENTING BOYS
http://www.allaboutparenting.org/parenting-boys-faq.htm
Parenting Boys: How can I instill virtues in my son at an early age?
Parenting boys is joyful and serious work! It is both a wild ride on an all terrain vehicle through the mountains and a quiet Saturday snuggled up reading. Parenting boys is like holding a tiger by the tail and later that same day, like a new puppy cuddled up asleep on your lap. Our boys are the male leaders of tomorrow. How can we instill values in them at an early age so they grow up to be honest, responsible, hard-working, trustworthy men?
As the parents of boys, we must learn to be their benevolent ruler. We must expect to be respected and obeyed. We must not tolerate rebellious or disrespectful behavior. We are our son's first image of authority. As he treats us, he will go on to treat other authority figures as he gets out into the world.
Here are some tips for parenting boys that we can suggest:
Parenting Boys: How can I instill virtues in my son at an early age?
Parenting boys is joyful and serious work! It is both a wild ride on an all terrain vehicle through the mountains and a quiet Saturday snuggled up reading. Parenting boys is like holding a tiger by the tail and later that same day, like a new puppy cuddled up asleep on your lap. Our boys are the male leaders of tomorrow. How can we instill values in them at an early age so they grow up to be honest, responsible, hard-working, trustworthy men?
As the parents of boys, we must learn to be their benevolent ruler. We must expect to be respected and obeyed. We must not tolerate rebellious or disrespectful behavior. We are our son's first image of authority. As he treats us, he will go on to treat other authority figures as he gets out into the world.
Here are some tips for parenting boys that we can suggest:
- Point out desirable behaviors to your son. When you read "Where the Red Fern Grows," point out that Billy made and saved his own money for two years to buy his own hunting dogs.
- Be a good example to your son. If your son hears you lying on the phone to your boss, he will get the message that lying is okay if the situation calls for it. Be consistent and follow your own rules!
- Praise good behavior. Always make it a point to "catch" your son doing something good. If he helps his little sister up when she falls off her bike, praise him for being compassionate and helpful.
- Don't let bad behavior slide by. The longer a child is allowed to get away with something, the more difficult it will be to break the habit later. Nip bad behavior in the bud, before it becomes a habit!
- Discuss current events. Depending on your son's age, talk with him about what is on the news or what is going on in his school. Point out good and bad behavior and the resulting consequences for those involved.
- Remember, someone once said that values cannot be learned in a day, but must be learned day-by-day. Be loving, be available, be consistent. Your sons deserve it.
CREATIVE IDEAS
http://www.educationworld.com/a_lesson/fillers/fillers021.shtml
Correct the Teacher
Builds listening skills
Instruct students to follow along as you read. Let them know that you will make mistakes as you read on purpose. You might throw in errors of grammar and pronunciation. You might insert errors that are out of context. As the students pick up on an error, they should quickly raise their hands. See who will be first to spot each error.
Videotape Book Report
Builds presentation and analysis skills
Set up a video camera in the back of the room and have each child videotape him or herself presenting a 30-second "commercial" for a book they read. The students should tell what is good about the book within 30 seconds and then they have 2 more minutes to read a favorite passage from the book -- a passage that might motivate others to want to read the book!
Detective Spellcheck
Builds spelling and observation skills
Write 10 words on the board. These should be words the students already know. (This week's spelling words might be good words to use.) Go over the list of words with students. Then instruct them to lay their heads on their desks. When their heads are down, erase one of the words and rewrite it with a spelling error in it. When you announce "Go to work, detectives!" the students can raise their heads and try to figure out which word is misspelled. You can have students raise their hands as soon as they figure out which word is misspelled, or you can have each student write the correct spelling of the misspelled word on a sheet of paper. Correct the papers for a spelling grade.
A-B-C, 1-2-3
Builds sequencing skills
Provide a variety of boxed items from the supermarket. Challenge students put the boxes in sequence. They might sequence numerically according to weight, length, or price; or they might sequence by alphabetical order.
Math in Real Life
Builds awareness of the role of math in real life
Try to make time each day for students to share ways in which they encounter math in real life. Keep a running list of the places and times they find math -- to drive home the understanding that math skills are very important and practical in life.
Correct the Teacher
Builds listening skills
Instruct students to follow along as you read. Let them know that you will make mistakes as you read on purpose. You might throw in errors of grammar and pronunciation. You might insert errors that are out of context. As the students pick up on an error, they should quickly raise their hands. See who will be first to spot each error.
Videotape Book Report
Builds presentation and analysis skills
Set up a video camera in the back of the room and have each child videotape him or herself presenting a 30-second "commercial" for a book they read. The students should tell what is good about the book within 30 seconds and then they have 2 more minutes to read a favorite passage from the book -- a passage that might motivate others to want to read the book!
Detective Spellcheck
Builds spelling and observation skills
Write 10 words on the board. These should be words the students already know. (This week's spelling words might be good words to use.) Go over the list of words with students. Then instruct them to lay their heads on their desks. When their heads are down, erase one of the words and rewrite it with a spelling error in it. When you announce "Go to work, detectives!" the students can raise their heads and try to figure out which word is misspelled. You can have students raise their hands as soon as they figure out which word is misspelled, or you can have each student write the correct spelling of the misspelled word on a sheet of paper. Correct the papers for a spelling grade.
A-B-C, 1-2-3
Builds sequencing skills
Provide a variety of boxed items from the supermarket. Challenge students put the boxes in sequence. They might sequence numerically according to weight, length, or price; or they might sequence by alphabetical order.
Math in Real Life
Builds awareness of the role of math in real life
Try to make time each day for students to share ways in which they encounter math in real life. Keep a running list of the places and times they find math -- to drive home the understanding that math skills are very important and practical in life.
Friday, June 15, 2007
ETHAN'S BIRTHDAY PICS
Happy Birthday Ethan!! A real Cars fan. KA-CHOW!!
(I love the birthday cake. I think it's very cute!)
Thursday, June 14, 2007
TAKING THE OPPORTUNITY
I am now one of the many people who are taking the opportunity to earn while blogging. It's not easy being a stay-at-home mom and being totally dependent financially on my husband. For the longest time, I have wanted to join the many paid blogging sites but I did not have the courage to do so for fear of doing something wrong. But when friends recommended bloggerwave I decided to give it a try. I figured, I could always give it a shot. Besides, what else am I good at these days except blogging (and homeschooling, of course). I registered my blog and I was approved! And so, the first step is done.
I am actually quite excited about this. I still find everything new but I am sure that I will continue to blog away everyday like I always do. Yup, only a few months since I started blogging, I realized that my day is not complete when I check my blog and post something... anything. So why don't you drop by bloggerwave too and see what opportunities they have in store for you. They just might wokr for both you and me. =D
Bloggerwave
I am actually quite excited about this. I still find everything new but I am sure that I will continue to blog away everyday like I always do. Yup, only a few months since I started blogging, I realized that my day is not complete when I check my blog and post something... anything. So why don't you drop by bloggerwave too and see what opportunities they have in store for you. They just might wokr for both you and me. =D
Bloggerwave
ANOTHER LETTER
Here's another beautiful letter from a homeschooling mom (www.homeschoolfreestuff.com)...
Relaxed Homeschooling: How I Jumped In
When we started homeschooling officially last September, I didn't really know what I was expected to do versus not do with a child at home learning. I had read everything I could get my hands on since the day she was born concerning this topic but to really be doing it was another matter to me. I had taken an introduction to homeschooling class at a nearby church, hoping that my answers would be found there. Not finding satisfactory answers to the questions I had concerning the "right" way to homeschool, I jumped right in with school anyway.
I had been told everything from you wouldn't need to spend anything to some whom spent close to $1,000 per year per child. I also had been told about all sorts of books, lesson plans and other manipulatives that one just had to have to homeschool. I had visited many different households that ranged from an actual schoolroom complete with a library including rows and a system to find books to just a table in the kitchen.
A suffocating feeling began to completely overwhelm me. It made me remember when my daughter was two and a helpful friend gave me a stack of catalogs when I expressed an interest. Being an avid reader, I figured looking through a bunch of catalogs would be fun. That was hardly true as I tried to make sense of all this confusing information.
In the end, I purchased nothing and headed for the library instead. The way I thought, Kindergarten was optional anyway in our state, so I couldn't really mess up something that wasn't even required by law. With a bachelor's degree myself, I figured I had time to learn how to homeschool even if maybe we weren't doing it correctly this first year.
I am really happy that we started this year with no lesson plans, no formal curriculum, and no schedule of how our days would be. I felt that she was just a child and she should enjoy this part of her life. I never wanted to rush her growing up. I felt that today we want our children to know too much, too soon. I saw the other families rushing around and the mothers were so tired. As I was totally enjoying our days this year, I often wondered if we were actually doing school wrong. So, I read more about how to homeschool. It was then that I read about unschooling.
I had never heard anything like this and it was so similar to the way we were doing things. Anything that was learning counted as school for the day. The line that divided our day of actual school and just life was so blurred there was barely any distinction at all. The attendance record I had printed out to keep for her 180 days of school filled up quickly as I realized we were learning all seven days a week. It was in bits and spurts; nothing formal. Some days we would delve far into a topic and others we would just brush the surface of something. But we were learning and that was all it was about in my view. When confronted with some that schooled 4 days versus 5 days a week, I just laughed inside as I again felt the freedom of not having a schedule.
Part of me wondered as we were playing with the garden outside if she was learning what she needed to know when. Fearful that perhaps we weren't doing school correctly yet, I asked around. Finding stressed out mothers was perhaps the biggest shock to me. Homeschooling is supposed to bring freedom into our lives, not stress. I listened and found these same mothers who supported the freedom mentioned as an idea were not able to make it a reality in their own lives.
Again, I found that learning from life naturally is so fun and free. As this year draws to a close in the education realm, I am finding that school for us is really life. I am not comparing myself to others any longer. We've made it through one year and it was fantastic. I wouldn't do anything different. In fact, school for us will never really end one year and take a break. Life doesn't so we shall just go on as we have all year.
Did my child learn all she needed to know with the freedom of unschooling this year? If I were to take inventory of all she has done, I would say her experiences have been great and varied. She has learned how to read, done compound math problems, started her multiplication tables, tried every scientific experiment she can get me to help her with and stretched her creativity with all sorts of art media. She has grown in areas I never expected. The biggest blessing of all has been seeing her desire to learn only grow and multiply. I have never had to force her to learn. She needs a mere guided hand from me. I have come to see that this is what unschooling is all about and we are absolutely having a ball.
-K.B.-
Relaxed Homeschooling: How I Jumped In
When we started homeschooling officially last September, I didn't really know what I was expected to do versus not do with a child at home learning. I had read everything I could get my hands on since the day she was born concerning this topic but to really be doing it was another matter to me. I had taken an introduction to homeschooling class at a nearby church, hoping that my answers would be found there. Not finding satisfactory answers to the questions I had concerning the "right" way to homeschool, I jumped right in with school anyway.
I had been told everything from you wouldn't need to spend anything to some whom spent close to $1,000 per year per child. I also had been told about all sorts of books, lesson plans and other manipulatives that one just had to have to homeschool. I had visited many different households that ranged from an actual schoolroom complete with a library including rows and a system to find books to just a table in the kitchen.
A suffocating feeling began to completely overwhelm me. It made me remember when my daughter was two and a helpful friend gave me a stack of catalogs when I expressed an interest. Being an avid reader, I figured looking through a bunch of catalogs would be fun. That was hardly true as I tried to make sense of all this confusing information.
In the end, I purchased nothing and headed for the library instead. The way I thought, Kindergarten was optional anyway in our state, so I couldn't really mess up something that wasn't even required by law. With a bachelor's degree myself, I figured I had time to learn how to homeschool even if maybe we weren't doing it correctly this first year.
I am really happy that we started this year with no lesson plans, no formal curriculum, and no schedule of how our days would be. I felt that she was just a child and she should enjoy this part of her life. I never wanted to rush her growing up. I felt that today we want our children to know too much, too soon. I saw the other families rushing around and the mothers were so tired. As I was totally enjoying our days this year, I often wondered if we were actually doing school wrong. So, I read more about how to homeschool. It was then that I read about unschooling.
I had never heard anything like this and it was so similar to the way we were doing things. Anything that was learning counted as school for the day. The line that divided our day of actual school and just life was so blurred there was barely any distinction at all. The attendance record I had printed out to keep for her 180 days of school filled up quickly as I realized we were learning all seven days a week. It was in bits and spurts; nothing formal. Some days we would delve far into a topic and others we would just brush the surface of something. But we were learning and that was all it was about in my view. When confronted with some that schooled 4 days versus 5 days a week, I just laughed inside as I again felt the freedom of not having a schedule.
Part of me wondered as we were playing with the garden outside if she was learning what she needed to know when. Fearful that perhaps we weren't doing school correctly yet, I asked around. Finding stressed out mothers was perhaps the biggest shock to me. Homeschooling is supposed to bring freedom into our lives, not stress. I listened and found these same mothers who supported the freedom mentioned as an idea were not able to make it a reality in their own lives.
Again, I found that learning from life naturally is so fun and free. As this year draws to a close in the education realm, I am finding that school for us is really life. I am not comparing myself to others any longer. We've made it through one year and it was fantastic. I wouldn't do anything different. In fact, school for us will never really end one year and take a break. Life doesn't so we shall just go on as we have all year.
Did my child learn all she needed to know with the freedom of unschooling this year? If I were to take inventory of all she has done, I would say her experiences have been great and varied. She has learned how to read, done compound math problems, started her multiplication tables, tried every scientific experiment she can get me to help her with and stretched her creativity with all sorts of art media. She has grown in areas I never expected. The biggest blessing of all has been seeing her desire to learn only grow and multiply. I have never had to force her to learn. She needs a mere guided hand from me. I have come to see that this is what unschooling is all about and we are absolutely having a ball.
-K.B.-
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