TELL ME MORE

From one of my favorite homeschooling sites:


The Two Sided Question And The Dangerous Why

The word "Why" is actually one of the most ineffective words when you need to find out some information.

From the parent's side, when you want to know information about something, often we ask our children "Why" something happened, or "why" they did something.

The problem with using the word "why" is that it immediately invokes negative feelings. It's almost impossible to use the word "why" without sounding accusatory. So your child immediately becomes defensive and anxiety begins to set in. So probably, you won't get the information you need.

Instead, trying using the phrase "Tell me more" about what happened, or whatever else you need information about. It requests the same information without all the negative baggage.

From your child's perspective, one of the hallmarks of homeschooled children is that they don't have any fear when it comes to speaking with adults, and asking lots of questions. In this respect, the word "why" also invokes reserved feelings when a child asks why. Why not teaching your children this same technique?

Instead of your child asking "Why" something is, how about having them use: "Please tell me more."The word "why" automatically carries negative baggage with adults, why not bypass it altogether when asking for information.