KIDS AND CHORES

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10 Ways to Get Kids to Have a Good Attitude Towards Chores

Dateline: 06/15/07
By Jennie von Eggers

Does getting your kids to do their chores, feel like an uphill battle? How many times do you end up doing the work yourself because it's just easier? Many times, parents feel they neither have the time nor the energy to train their children in this fundamental area. Unfortunately, the easy road is not always the best for our children and family as a whole. Having kids do daily chores not only brings with it the rewards of a clean house, but can also instill responsibility, skills, and values that can last a lifetime. With just a little time and effort, you can create an environment that will motivate your children to do chores and do it with a good attitude.

1. Start Them Young!
I'm often asked what is a good age to begin implementing chores. My response is usually, "when they can make a mess!" If a child is capable of taking things out of the toy box or off a shelf, they are capable of putting it back. It may seem like more work for mom at the time to train them to put things back, but the benefits of having your child learn this skill and responsibility from early on will pay off. You can easily assign a toddler a daily job such as unloading the clothes from the dryer to a basket, throwing away food wrappers as mommy prepares meals or just give them a water bottle and rag to wipe down the fridge. Most young children find this enjoyable as they love to mimic what they see grownups doing.

2. Make it Fun!
Just as a fun, relaxed work environment for adults makes for an enjoyable job, the same is true for the environment in which children do chores. When my kids are doing chores, I like to put on some upbeat music and turn it up really loud. This seems to get everyone going. Another way to create a fun atmosphere is to add a little competition! Try setting the buzzer to see who can get their chores done before it goes off. Or for those times when you need a quick pickup (like when your friend calls and says she's in the neighborhood and is going to stop by), try doing the 10 Pick-Up Game. Everyone has to pick up and put away ten items back to their proper place!

3. Lead by Example!
A good leader is good at delegating but also must be willing to do the work they are calling others to do. When I was young, I knew of a family where the children were responsible for almost all of the chores (including preparing most of the meals) while their parents hardly lifted a finger around the house. Unfortunately, this bred a feeling of resentment and contempt for chores as the kids felt more like servants than part of a family team. There is a fine line from mom being a "task master" to being a good leader. A good rule of thumb is to not ask your kids to do work that you are not willing to do yourself.

4. Be Part of the Family Team!
In my house we have a saying, "There's no free-ride!" I firmly believe, that chores are foundational for learning about responsibility and team work. I cringe when I hear kids say they don't have to do chores. Taking out the garbage occasionally or hanging up your coat does not breed a sense of responsibility as a family member. Giving your children the "option" to do chores is like giving adults the "option" to work for their living - most wouldn't do it if they didn't have to. When a child knows that as part of the "family team" they are expected to be a contributing member, it boost self-esteem and bonds the family unit. It also builds a strong work ethic which will follow your children throughout their lives.

5. Get A System!
Half the battle to making chore time go smoothly is having a good chore system in place. Could you imagine your local city government trying to do their jobs without guidelines or procedures in place first? Just telling your kids to do their chores each day can be laborious to mom and come across as nagging to children. With a "chore system" the "system" becomes foreman, absolving mom from that position. Chore systems run the gamete from peg charts, flip charts to dry erase boards. Whatever you decide works best for your family, a good system will clearly lay out and track what is expected from each child.

6. Get Organized!
Organization is crucial to help make doing chores a smoother process. This can be accomplished by making available things such as plastic tubs or laundry baskets to help with sorting and clearly labeling cleaning supplies. Also, make sure to give proper step-by-step instructions on how to complete each job. This should only have to be done once or twice before your child can do it on their own.

7. Rewards!
Children's chores is much like a practice of what's to come in adult life. We all like to be rewarded for our hard work. This can be done with a monthly allowance or non-monetary payment such as "earning" time on a computer game. In my house, my children get a modest monthly allowance for their chores. However, we do expect them to work occasionally for "free" such as when extra work is needed, like cleaning the garage. We also give them opportunity to earn extra money by doing jobs above and beyond what is normally expected of them. This enables children to enjoy the benefits of hard work and prepares them for adulthood.

8. Consequences!
Consequences must be implemented in order to have a smooth chore working environment. If there are no consequences to when a child doesn't do their chores, then really the chores are just an "option". When a child has the "option" not do their chores (with no adverse consequences), then they lose the valuable character building rewards that mandatory chores can bring. It sends a message that work and responsibility is only something you need to do, IF you feel like it. But that is not real life and does not prepare a child well for adulthood.

9. Work First, then Play!
As a home schooling mother of four, the first part of our average day is spent getting our work done. The mornings and early afternoons are filled with schoolwork first, chores second. This leaves the rest of the day free to enjoy and is a great motivator to getting those jobs done.

10. Take a Break!
Although I am a strong proponent of chores I firmly believe that you have to just let things go sometimes. In my house, Sunday's are our day of rest and relaxation. The children always look forward to having the whole day free. Of course it usually means that Monday's are a big cleaning day but the break is well worth it. I also like to give my children the "day off" on special days such as their birthdays or when life just gets too busy.

Jennie von Eggers is co-owner of Trigger Memory Systems which publishes creative learning products and has authored; Times Tales, Zone Cleaning for Kids and Memory Triggers. She and her husband Brian, home school their 4 child in Eastern Oregon.